Dante May Dump: The Hit Tv Series

Dante May Dump (DMD) is the second-most-popular television program† in history, the first being Slam Shack.

Dante May Dump follows the supernatural exploits of Dante, a man with a sugoi attitude problem. Uniquely, the pilot episode, entitled "Another Bum Bites the Crust," begins when Dante is 12 years old (in every other episode, he is 257). In this episode, it is shown that Dante hates his mom to the maximum for never baking pizza pockets long enough, and he takes revenge by ordering large pizzas and stuffing the crusts up his butt. One time, the pizza restaurant accidentally includes the G-Demon Crystal in a pizza — one that Dante orders — and when Dante shoves a crust from said pizza up his butt, he gains the demonic powers of the G-Demon Crystal. From thenceforth, Dante knows that it is his destiny to fight the demons with their own power.

Every DMD episode opens with Dante eating cheese-meltingly-hot pizza and backflipping in his gun shop. The real adventure begins when the phone on his desk rings and Dante gets a tip from an anonymous ally (known to fans as Humble Whisperer (humberu weesupahrah)) as to the location of a new demonic crime. Dante's persona is intentionally modeled upon that of Crashcombo. His weapons are two guns (Boomcock and Blastbeast) and a huge sword (Hambindling).

† Supportive arguments have been made for the time Dag Infinite good-naturedly used his thigh muscles to take over every television station so that he could flex his bod for the masses; however, this was a singular, unofficial event, and most judges agree that it cannot be interpreted as a "program."