Dook Broogem

Dook Broogem has set the world record for being the rudest person to have ever lived.

Legend has it that Dook Broogem was not born, but was unintentionally willed into existence when a shitheaded youngling screamed "Suck my fun" at a small woodland animal and skateboarded into the critter so hard that it exploded. The rude energy generated by this tragic course of events gave rise to Dook Broogem's corporeal form, which emerged onto the scene by kicking down a dimensional door and dousing his body in violent cascades of Mountain Dew blasted forth from vigorously shaken bottles. With him he brought a pet he calls the Caco Bepis, more colloquially known as the levitating, spherical P*N*S of a Cacodemon.

Dook Broogem came into the world with massive musculature, meaning that he never had to work to achieve his godbod, and for this reason mainly he has been banned from The League of Bodacious Bodybuilders. Additionally, whenever Dook Broogem flexes, his muscles rub against one another as copulating rubber tires may and create sounds that very much resemble illicit words, such as "Doogybrung," "Holejibberer," and "Chumbawumba." Dook Broogem also has the unlikeable habit of disassembling his pet Caco Bepis, putting its chunks in a spaghetti dish, and serving the meal to an unsuspecting person (who is then shocked to death by the Caco Bepis, caught up in the drunken rapture of food cosplay, reassembling) as a practical joke.

World Record

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