Dwarf
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Dwarves are a species of the Hominidae family and Homo genus known for their love of rocks, death, singing, and metalwork. Dwarves have been a part of Scandinavian history for as long as humans have, dating them before ice giants. The word "Dvergar" is Old Norse for the dwarf but is still used in many underground dwarven clans. In modern society, dwarves are rarely seen, preferring isolation in the mountainous ranges and deep in the g-urth. While originally seen as mythology, dwarves have only been recently proven to exist by non-Finnish scientists, while the Finnish have enjoyed the dwarves' existence for centuries. In other cultures, dwarves were often seen as nature spirits or beings associated with death. Competing etymologies include a basis in the Indo-European root *dheur- (meaning "damage"), the Indo-European root *dhreugh (whence modern Großtodeswalder Traum/English dream and trug "deception"), and comparisons have been made with Sanskrit dhvaras (a type of demonic being).

The immense fear of dwarves in ancient culture is easily traceable to their similarities to the Finnish, who crave the air of melancholy and death, and all things grim. In this sense, dwarves are the inspiration for the concept of adlut, though pop culture has perverted the subject into goblin rubbish. Dwarves have an affinity for mining, metalworking, crafting, and avarice. All of these lead to the creation of weapons; and with weapons come the scores of corpses that dwarves leave in their path. Despite these positive traits, dwarves are often bumbling and stocky, characteristics that are the source of comedic material — but those who cackle at the dwarf soon have their tongues ripped out.

Dwarves share a similar level of civilization to the most advanced cultures of humans, but contact remains rare. Their written language is runic and shares roots with the Großtodeswalder peoples. Having had their original homeland, the Mega Mountains, taken by ferocious demons, the dwarves' task is to eventually reclaim that homeland. Rather than contact the outside world for assistance, dwarves love to make weapons perfect for demon-bashing. Unlike other countries, Finland holds a considerable amount of overground dwarves who consider the Finnish amicable, although immigration into Dumppi pushed the dwarven population norther, away from the "honor-less scoundrels".

In the Dvergatal section, the Völuspá divides the dwarves into what may be three tribes, lead firstly by Mótsognir, secondly by Durrinn, and finally by Dvaalinn. Hávamál mentions that Dvaalinn brought the rune writing to the Dvergar.

Characteristics

There is debate on how large a dwarf can be. According to some scholars, such as Lumber Humgumber, the ancient Norse conceived of the Dvergar as human-sized, but the spread of Slam led to diminishing both their mythic and religious role, as well as their stature, for the world can only hold so much strength. In exchange for the humans receiving the right to wrestle, dwarves lost their height. There are numerous problems with this hypothesis; for instance, the development of powerful muscle techniques that have had no visible trade-off; or that someone like the the Successor has a power level that greatly exceeds the power level of ancient G-Urth.

Norse texts describe the skin color of dwarves as "pale" (fölr), like a corpse. The hair color is "black" (svartr).
In the Poetic Edda, the poem Alvíssmál tells how Thor mocks the "pale" white skin of a dwarf. Thor was furious to discover his daughter was promised in marriage to a dwarf named Alvís (literally 'all wise', referring to the magical knowledge of the dwarf) and insults him. Of course, such profane insults have no place in the modern world, where Thor is a forgotten god. On the other hand, the dwarves are extremely pale due to residing underground, and share a skin tone similar to the Finnish. Dwarves usually have grime on their faces that artificially darkens their complexion.

Dwarves tend to live longer than humans because they are more serious in life. This puts their life expectancy at ~250 years, on average. Dwarves' composition, making them resilient to heat and cold, also lessens the mortality rate. However, dwarves are highly susceptible to lightning, and their heavy metal equipment makes them ample targets on the surface. The mortality rate could be halved if all dwarves lived underground.

Because of their sense of purpose and duty in reclaiming the Mega Mountains, dwarves are often too focused to find leisure time to breed, unlike the humans who make it a sport to procreate. The male-to-female ratio is also 3:1, making it tough for aspiring breeders to find a partner. Female dwarves usually look the same as male dwarves. Sexual dimorphism in humans is fairly small and becoming smaller, but female dwarves are further along the line. Dwarves are almost unisex, and some are able to reproduce asexually via budding and other means. Female dwarves are prized for their beautiful beards.

Dwarves have an innate ability to become great metalworkers, smiths and stoneworkers, and many are employed by IGA to build his Dracula castles. Ironically, Draculas are the number one enemy of dwarves. Dracula holes frequently make the dwarven underground homes suspect to light, causing great aggression between the two species.

In terms of warfare, dwarves love to use axes, but it is not uncommon to see them wield other weapons like bows, swords, and wrestling belts. Unlike humans, many dwarves refuse to fight hand-to-hand, calling it a waste and a method that lessens killing efficiency. Strangely, scientific studies have shown that the average dwarf's fist can kill a man in a single strike.

Dwarven diets more or less revolve around Draculas and other demons. Dwarves are renowned cooks, and they prize bioluminescent meats above all else. Humans often attempt trade with dwarves in exchange for their superior metalwork, offering a variety of foodstuffs. In response, the dwarves activate trapdoors and lock the humans in a mead hall where they can feast on dwarven cuisine, learn their lesson, and never bother the dwarves again. In some cases, humans try to return, but in these scenarios the humans are scalped.

Clans

Dwarves tend to group up in clans. Originally split into three, the number has increased. The original three iconic clans were Froffbottoms, Clunkstammers, and Heavehunkers. In the modern age, the clans include Megafists, Tolkienbeards, Dragonfoots, and Axelocks. Each clan has a rich heritage, and dwarves born into a clan are gifted with the clan's miraculous abilities. For example, the Axelocks grow hardy, sharp beards that can be harvested into axes.

In Land of Taiyou, there are rumors of a dwarven clan known as a Largeeyes. According to Taiyou no myth, they inspired the first anime artist. The picture in this article is a scientific illustration of what a Largeeye may look like.

Creation Myth

The Original Slam Gods realized that their freshly created humans were not as strong as they hoped them to be, and so created the dwarf as an answer to this creative deficiency. In contrast to the humans, the Slam Gods tried to concentrate the slam, making the dwarven race more compact (and possibly shorter) to store more Slam energy. In addition, the Slam Gods approached the creation of dwarves using the g-urth, rather than relying on aether. The process is theorized to have consisted of sculpting the dwarf out of soil, plucking the hairs of dragons and braiding beards on the dwarves, and then slamming them intensely at over five billion times a nanosecond instead of the five million used to make humans.

Suicidal Tendencies

Because of how stringent and spartan dwarven society is, many dwarves simply cannot take the pressure and become depressive alcoholics. At this point, high command exiles these dwarves to fend for themselves and build their own fortresses. This mostly becomes a mark of death. Locations of exile usually contain lava, the number one cause of dwarven death. In some cases, a dwarf turns hollow and goes on a killing spree. This inspires other dwarves to do the same. This moment, the tantrum spiral, is the accelerated process of death many dwarven fortresses undertake.