A coastal city-state in Southern Eurump. Martinettio has a vibrant wine culture, and even more vibrant world of science and arts. Many famous artists, like Diplo and Jacopo Pumppano, come from Martinettio's streets, where the plutocracy's patrons number in the hundreds, and their wealth, in the bingellions. A dozen renaissances were led in Martinettio, spurring the largest periods cultural developments before all ideology was renounced in the name of Slam.

Martinettio's success lies in its position where it can openly trade with Finland, Mashchester, and Certain Country as a central hub of trade. Unlike other countries, Martinettio's city-state enjoys considerable freedom from the Grandgod Church or the remnant warmongers of the Chapel. It is currently headed by the even hands and tibiae of skeletons, the Beaumont Booglers.

Poetry from Martinettio is largely responsible for moving away from the ideals of courtly love. The Dolce Stil Muscle effectively transitioned world culture from fun-loving to iron-pumping. The father of modern science, Tuff Da'Bicepci, compiled a medical journal that outlined muscle nutrition and growth. Martinettio's artisans were also responsible for popularizing having a sculpture of yourself (with thrice the muscle level) in your living room.

Martinettio's rare brand of democracy is dominated by guilds and merchants, where guilds and merchants will personally purchase the services of bodybuilders. After openly declaring their stance on bills, the populace votes on which sponsored bodybuilder is the ho most handsome. Therefore, the ho most handsome policies are put into place. In several isolated cases, this voting system caused several economic and diplomatic breakdowns such as when Dag Infinite sponsored total war with Krush, whose devilish hedgehog ranks then obliterated Martinettio's navy.

Another time, Hefty McRiled coerced a politician to let him sponsor a shark genocide law. When the policy succeeded, the mass extinction of sharks led to a colossal shift to the ecosystem, and the Dour Sea's formerly unknown Slambeast population started to attack coastal towns. They were only repelled when Makkusu Korossosu donated 3,000 crates of hot-blooded anime soundtracks whose playing effects temporarily bulked up every citizen by a two hundred percent to let them take on the hideous Slambeast horde.