"Mystic Slam"


Arguably the most famous song ever written. Its author remains unknown. The notation was discovered on a piece of paper beneath a stone shaped like a brashly flexing arm. Some have called its compositional characteristics "unmistakably Diplo-like", even though scientific analysis of the sheet music reveals the paper to be much older than Diplo. When Diplo has been questioned on this matter by believers and non-believers alike, he has only responded with a silent smirk. "Mystic Slam" has remained on the Top 10 Mega Musics since the poll first existed.

An unofficial, instrumental version may be heard here.

The lyrics are:

SLAM GODS HAVE THE MYSTIC POW-UH-ER
TO SLAM TO INFINITY
THEIR BODS ARE LIKE RIGHTEOUS TOWERS
TOO MUSCLEY TO BE BELIEVED
YES YOU KNOW GOOD'LL WIN IN THE END
ON THE SLAM GODS YOU CAN ALWAYS DEPEND
OH SLAM GODS HAVE THE MYSTIC POW-UH-ER
TO SLAM TO INFINITY

IF YOU EVER HAVE A PRO-BUH-LEM
THERE IS GOOD NEWS FOR YOU — (YEAH!!!)
YOU CAN GO AND QUIT YOUR SOBBIN
OH THE SLAM GODS WILL RESCUE YOU

SLAM SLAM SLAM SLAM
SLAM SLAM SLAM SLAM
SLAM SLAM SLAM SLAM
SLAM SLAM SLAM SLAM!!!

SLAM GODS HAVE THE MYSTIC POW-UH-ER
TO SLAM TO INFINITY
BAD GUYS, RUN AND COW-UH-ER (RUN!!!)
THERE IS JUSTICE COMING A-PLEN-TY

SLAM —
FOR —
EV —
ER!!!

There is said to be a rare vinyl recording performed by Dag Infinite.