Plated Ou

Plated Ou was an Ancient Geek philosopher who is considered one of the most significant figures in Western Eurumpean philosophy. He mainly lectured only through his biceps (an early example of UFL), but one of his disciples, Ari Toddler, managed to transcribe them into a 100,000,000 page manual. Unfortunately, Ari Toddler was a huge babby and misinterpreted billions of the muscular movements of Plated Ou, giving rise to centuries of Bad Babby Thoughts in the West. Modern depictions show Plated Ou in only minimal toga; however, historical records indicate that Plated Ou, as goes his name, was always adorned in full plate armor. Indeed, Plated Ou was in fact fairly supportive of not using muscles for everything. In Ari Toddler's Anal Lyrics, he mentions that Plated Ou invented the plate. In contrast to today, plates were mainly used for smashing and not eating on.


Plated Ou bumbling against Colossus of Rudes, courtesy of archaeological agency, IGN

Historians believe that the figure they know as Plated Ou was actually Zokraters, and that some baka mixed the two up. Otherwise, everyone generally agrees that Ari Toddler is a big bad babby and, unfortunately, not a muscle babby.

Plated Ou once took on the Colossus of Rudes. He presumably won, as the Colossus no longer exists. Then again, neither does Plated Ou. What a mystery for the ages…