Why would you want to kill a skeleton? They don't even give that many souls.

The bulk of normal skeletons live in Skeleton City. Skeletons often conceal themselves by hiding inside people and animals, because they are sneaky, as illustrated at the bottom of every page of Grim Synergies.


"Now, first of all, you're being kind of a jerk."

Stoned Skull and Paranthropus


Fossil ancestor of skeletons (but not Dante)

At this stage, the early pre-skeleton had more or less mastered being a skeleton, but was not yet any good at skeletoning.

The rest of the pre-skeleton would later evolve into walls. This is why skeletons tend to be found in places that have walls, a fact that is well-known to people with degrees in The Sciences.

The Stoned Skull is called such because he is extremely chillaxed on account of his invulnerability due to years of postmastering in the shale pits of the Giant's Swelling which turned the entire contents of his head into granite. He shed his useless body after learning to type with the power of pure chillaxation. Even Alucard stealing souls from him doesn't harsh his groove. Stoned Skull lives in a bedsit where he grows Stone Roses and enjoys his twin hobbies of breeding chaffinches and eating food.

In the evenings he likes to rotate around his axis and float up and down. It's good for his chi. Creaking Skull, who lusts after creak-heavy activities, does not approve, and doesn't let the other skeletons hang around with Stoned Skull: he is a bad influence and will interfere with their motorcycling and exploding lessons. Creaking Skull's only rival is Paranthropus, and nobody respects Paranthropus who gets killed an average of 231,000 times every time Alucard forgets his car keys because Paranthropus knows how to own rings but not how to put them on. (Also, Paranthropus only remembers how to own rings very rarely, meaning he is generally mediocre).

Paranthropus also knows very little about Westerns — a big mistake, since all lesser skeletons are huge fans of Sergio Leone.